And the children of Israel did according to Moses’ order, and they borrowed from the Egyptians silver objects, golden objects, and garments. -Exodus 12:29-51 (Parsha Bo)
להוּבְנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֥ל עָשׂ֖וּ כִּדְבַ֣ר משֶׁ֑ה וַיִּשְׁאֲלוּ֙ מִמִּצְרַ֔יִם כְּלֵי־כֶ֛סֶף וּכְלֵ֥י זָהָ֖ב וּשְׂמָלֹֽת
By bringing tambourines into the dessert as they fled Egypt, the women showed their unwavering faith and trust in G-d, their overwhelming positivity in a seemingly chaotic situation.
We, as the women of our generation, also can lead the way and show our faith that the final redemption is upon us.
To clarify, we still deeply feel the bitterness of life now and pray passionately that sorrows and strife will end immediately.
But at the same time, our confidence that G-d will fulfill his promise should fill us with joy.
As women, with the strength of our innate faith, we can celebrate, even with music and dance, and then the men will follow our lead.*
I so want to feel like celebrating.
While I do believe intellectually that G-d is within me and all of us at every moment, sometimes I forget.
There are times where I get so caught up in suffering, when life doesn’t proceed as I think it should, and I fall back into old habits.
My teens aren’t religous enough. My husband isn’t saying the right things to me. I’m upset with myself for eating too much. I’m still carrying and acting out on childhood wounds. I’m tired and unmotivated and not doing enough.
It’s a heavy load to carry.
But then I remember the course I’ve chosen — one of faith, of surrendering to G-d’s will.
And I release the burden. I surrender. I allow Him in.
I’m a vessel.
It’s okay to say, “I’ve had a tough day but I know G-d is with me.”
Even as I type this, I’m reminding myself… I’m opening the channels for His love and light.
In sorrow and pain, will I choose to turn inward or to others? To worry and complain? Or will I go directly to the Source first?
I’m trying to be awake and atune. To synchronize and synergize my mind, body and soul. To allow His messages to come through.
Sometimes I succeed. It’s a journey, moment by moment.
I was, before this life, totally and completely with Hashem. “I” was unfragmented. Whole. Complete.
Each day that I’m here in this body, it’s a chance to put the pieces back together. To gather sparks. To peal back layers, find the light within and share it.
Hashem, I want You in my life. I’m open. I’m grateful for the good and seemingly bad moments, and for the struggle and heartache that seems to have swept over our world.
Now, I can turn the music up and dance. And, G-d willing, others will follow.
*source: Daily Wisdom, Inspiring Insights on the Torah portion from the Lubavitcher Rebbe, translated and adapted by Rabbi Moshe Wisnefsky